YALSA Pre-Conference Talk

I strongly believe humor and horror are very closely related. Each depends on surprise. Each let's the reader think, "I'm glad that didn't happen to me." And each works best when it combines ideas in new and unexpected ways. This is another area where teens are misunderstood. Just because those years are filled with serious issues doesn't mean teens don't like to laugh. Humor helps us all cope. Fantasy lets us escape. Humorous fantasy combines the best of both worlds.

I believe that teens enjoy my books because they're funny. Imagine you could move things with your mind. What would you do with that power? I'll read one very brief scene to you, from Hidden Talents. Martin, the narrator, is helping his friends learn to use their powers. One of them, nicknamed Trash because he's always breaking things, can move objects with his mind. In this scene, Trash discovers a new use for his talent.

[The following excerpt is from Hidden Talents, page 144]

So we were hanging out in the room. Torchie was playing the harmonica. All of a sudden, his chair jolted as if someone had given it a hard kick. It didn't move far enough to knock him off, but it sure got his attention. "Whoa!" Torchie shouted as jumped from his seat.

"Sorry," Trash said.

"No big deal," Torchie told him. He sat back down and returned to the thirty-ninth chorus of Red River Valley.

A minute later, Cheater screamed and leaped from the floor where he'd been sitting. As he twisted around, I saw the back of his underwear hanging over the top of his jeans.

"Wow," I said, amazed at the sight. "That's got to be the world's biggest wedgie."

"Sorry," Trash said.

"Did you do that to him on purpose?" Lucky asked as Cheater straightened out his clothing.

"No way," Trash said. "I'd never touch anybody's underwear on purpose. Not even with my mind." He shuddered.

[end of excerpt]

I'd like to think that this is what I bring to the party—a sense of fun, and an off-the-wall attitude. This doesn't mean I avoid serious issues. Martin has a lot of problems. But I'll take irony over angst any day.

The same chattering that got me in trouble with my teachers seems to work just fine on paper. I can joke, fool around, and explore ideas. I'm deeply honored that none of you has threatened to kick me out of your library. I'm thrilled by the support I've received from librarians across the country.

Before I get too maudlin, let me interject another bit of fluff. Many authors published their fantasy, science fiction, or horror under pen names. Some of them didn't manage to hide their real names very well. Here's a list of the least deceptive fantasy pen names:

Asteroid Lindgren

Crypts Crusher

Jane Golem

Dian Curtis RayGun

Judy Gloom

I asked my daughter the other day why she likes to read fantasy. She said, "Because it isn't a school assignment." I suspect there's a large portion of truth behind this glib response. Teens have a talent for snatching quality from the fringes of our world, and they don't depend on the establishment for aesthetic guidance. That's a good thing.

Some people feel fantasy shouldn't be taken seriously. They say it's not real literature. We all know that this is nonsense. But it's a pervasive myth. Writers are painfully aware of this bias. If you look at market listings, many publishers state, "No fantasy."

A moment's thought shows the absurdity of this. Most of our favorite books are fantasy—but they're also such good books that we don't notice the genre. Sure, if there's an elf or an alien on the cover, we know right off where the journey is going. But what about a pig who talks to a spider? Or a sailor who's kept from returning home by the wrath of the gods? What about a prince who speaks with the ghost of his father? I'm sure each of you could come up with dozens of examples.

The deepest bias is against horror. Again, the critics overlook a large body of classic works. Or maybe a large work of bodies.

Here's an exercise you can share with those who disdain horror. Take a look at one of the best-selling modern adventure books for young readers—Hatchet, by Gary Paulsen. It's not a horror novel, but the scene on page 180 where Brian finds the body of the pilot is as chilling as anything out there. It's wonderfully done.

Contemporary horror, when labeled as such, is often treated as if it's one step above or below pornography. Personally, I've figured a way around this bias. The next time I write a horror novel, I'm going to tell people I'm pioneering a new genre: "magical scariness." That will sucker those clueless folks who write about kid's books without spending any real time in the company of either kids or books.

You wonderful folks, on the other hand, don't judge a book by it's cover. Or its genre. I was lucky to be a library brat. But my luck wasn't exclusive. My mother tried to find the right book for every kid she ever met. You have that magical power, too. You can bring the space ships, the dragons, and the spine-tingling werewolves to the kids who are waiting to devour the tales. You can reach beyond the universe.

To finish up, and to avoid the risk of ending on a serious note, I'd like to share one more book list with you. As I'm sure you remember, the latest Star Wars movie was a prequel. When it came out, a lot of publishers were inspired to publish prequels of their own. Here's a list of the best of them.

1. Willy, Put the Food Away—The latest release from the bottomless Seuss estate, this tale of a boy who forgets to put leftovers in the fridge sets up the background for Green Eggs and Ham.

2. The Art Heist—The inside story of the real origin of the Basil E. Frankweiler fortune.

3. Let Piggy Fly the Plane—A pilot's lapse in judgement results in tons of action in this brief prequel to Lord of the Flies.

4. Skin the Bunny—not only a prequel, but also a kit allowing kids to make their own copy of Pat the Bunny.

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